Neymar. He might be one of the best players in the world right now, but for some people he’s really hard to like.
In fact, when you put together his recent behaviour, it bears all the hallmarks of that guy at 5-a-side that always comes along, but everyone silently hates and hopes that next week will be the one where he doesn’t turn up.
Let’s examine the evidence.
Neymar loses the ball and then barges a player into the barriers
We’ve all seen it happen. When there are barriers up around the pitch and things are getting a bit feisty, it’s not uncommon to see someone barged into them in a wrestling-style maneuver.
Here, we see Neymar exhibiting a text-book shoulder barge after losing the ball. Admire his technique as he gets him at pace, from the blind side and then smiles about it.
Neymar really hates it when you take the ball off him. pic.twitter.com/aUh4YovaMp
— ESPN FC (@ESPNFC) July 26, 2018
Luckily, this was at his own tournament. As if it was dished out in your Tuesday night kick about down the local AstroTurf, it might well have led to fisticuffs.
You just don’t do that.
He can’t take a foul
Having seen him dish out an absolute beauty of a foul above, you might think that when it happens to him he realises that it’s a bit of give and take and gets on with things. Right?
Just look at our next exhibit:
— A.D (@AD2554) July 3, 2018
Ok, so that might have been a bit of an exaggeration, but at this point it’s probably worth telling you a truly shocking statistic about him.
When you add up all the ridiculous amount of time he spent rolling around the floor in the World Cup Russia 2018, it amounted to 14 minutes! As Martin Keown said on the BBC commentary: “that’s more than I lie on a sunbed. All year.”
Rolling around on the floor making a meal of any physical contact is another big no at 5-a-side.
He’s been accused of cheating
Now, let’s be clear: we’re not the ones calling him a cheat.
But some people, noticeably on social media, have suggested that he might sometimes try to cheat the referee. You decide.
“I don’t care how many tricks he can do – don’t invite him to 5-a-side”
A couple of weeks of 5-a-side and we can see Neymar being mysteriously dropped from the WhatsApp group.
Don’t call us, we’ll call you, sunshine.
It’s a shame, when you consider he can do things like this:
— Bleacher Report (@BleacherReport) July 22, 2018